I awoke this morning
a few minutes before my alarm
was set to go off.
“Well. That’s odd
,” I thought, and promptly rolled back under the covers for a few more minutes of peace
. I didn’t think to wonder why until my stomach
performed the gastrointestinal
equivalent of slapping me upside the head when I turned on my side.
I knew exactly what that feeling was and did my best to ignore it. Stupid stomach. I had a final
in half an hour. The least it could do was wait until I was finished
I turned again, lying on my back; my stomach officially decided to give me the finger
My body jumped up seemingly under its own volition
, as my knee
would have given out if I had knowingly tried to do the same thing. I scanned the room frantically, looking for a garbage bin, a cardboard box
, an empty container
of any sort. Considering the fact that I haven’t taken out the trash
in well over a month, it’s not really a surprise I didn’t have any luck. I walked quickly to the door
and carefully down the hall
. I gag
ged about three feet away from the bathroom and prayed to Bog
I would get there on time. I rushed in and headed for an open stall.
I’m not going to try to describe the mechanics of vomiting with a torn ACL
. Suffice to say, it added a whole ‘nother level of discomfort to the procedure
. After I was able to breathe again, I walked over to the sink… and then back to the toilet. This lovely cycle
continued for about ten minutes. I hobbled back to my room after waving away an offer of help from some poor unfortunate
who wandered in to the lav
at the wrong time. I got dressed, gimped my way to my Intro toexam
, vomited again, offered my apologies, and gimp
ed my way back.
I’m in my room now as I write this, shirtless
and sweating. Christ
, I want to open a window, but that sort of thing is strictly Against the Rules when you’ve got a fever
. The only thing I can hope for now is that everything’ll all go away
when I close my eyes. Yeah. And monkeys will fly out of my ass.