Successful Outlook

He told me that he wasn’t what you’d call a superstitious man, he just didn’t see the harm in carrying it around with him. He did bring up a good point, it was one of the first fortune cookie fortunes that I’d seen in years that actually predicted some sort of happening. The writers of those things were getting lazy to be sure. Half of the “fortunes” these days were commands, and the other half were crappy inspiring clichés.

So, he had this little bit of paper in his wallet at all times, boastfully claiming: “This fortune will take you exactly where you want to go.”

“…in bed.”

We laughed for a second or two. That joke was old when I was twelve…

Unfortunately, this morning I got a call from his mother. Apparently the fortune slipped out of his wallet while he was at a coffee stand. Apparently he bent down to pick it up and the wind carried it off. Apparently still bent over he moved to pick it up. There were fucking witnesses to all of this. Anyway, like I said, he was half in the street by this time. Apparently he got hit in the head with a bus. Apparently he was on his was to see his shrink.

Jesus, I had no fucking idea that things were that bad