Yesterday I wrote a writeup about Nokia's new phone, the Nokia 3310, and when
I read about it I was shocked. I thought the Nokia 3210 was bad. Phones are more and
more becomming the new gamegear.
Once upon a time, phones were used as effective communication devices and
with them you could reach people all over the world. Today phones are expensive
little colorful boxes that you can play a game in two colors where you're
controlling a little snake (a 3 pixel wide line) that grows longer and longer
as you touch little boxes. FYI, there are actually better games out there. Go
home, to your dads PC or whatever, find some nice sharewaregames on the internet.
There are lot's and lot's of games with more than 2 colors... yes... that's right,
more than 2 colors. You can even buy games for a much cheaper price than your
little box you like to call "celluar phone", with millions of colors,
3d graphics, multiplayer support and so on. No but seriously, what the hell is
going on? A friend of mine just bought a Nokia 3210. The day after he bought it
he called me, being very happy and very proud that he just beat my record in snake.
So? I use my (Nokia 5110) to call phonecalls when I'm out (rarely happends btw),
send SMS messages, not to play stupid games, no... I use my PC to play stupid
games, and they're a hell lot more fun than the games the uber haxors within Nokia
has managed to develop. What's next? Eventually, Nokia will disable all abilities
to dial your friends, send messages, call 911 and so forth and transform the phones
into handheld gaming devices, packed with games and sell them for the same price and
all humans will be totally isolated from
eachother (some won't even notice) and sitting in front of their little 48x84 screens and trying to take as
many boxes as possible. No, but seriously WHAT is going on?
Here's a quote from Nokias hompage about their new evil invention:
"Mobile gaming is simply electrifying with the Nokia 3310. The new
vibra shock feature makes the phone vibrate at critical moments in gameplay - so you'll know
when you've been blasted by aliens in the cool Space Impact game, or when you hit the
walls in Snake II! Of course, if your prefer more sedate action, there is always
Bantumi and Pairs II. "
Simply electrifying? The new vibra shock!? critical moments in gameplay?!?! This sounds like the
description of the new Playstation 2 controller than a description of a "communication device"!
Start making real phones again dammit, or I'll get really mad!