user since
Wed Jun 22 2005 at 19:21:01 (13.1 years ago )
last seen
Wed Jun 22 2005 at 20:39:33 (13.1 years ago )
level / experience
1 (Initiate)
mission drive within everything
to try to explain, with everyone else, what can never really be explained
run-on sentences, enigmatics, music, acting
Sarah Lawrence College
"Someday, I am gonna grow wings. A chemical reaction. Hysterical and useless, hyterical and..." - lifted from Radiohead
Send private message to aburtonmatt

As a college student, I thought the wishy-washiness would go away -- like suddenly I would become a capable and knowing adult. I always pictured myself in a three-piece suit past the age of twenty, doing something important, talking to someone important (without stuttering, mind you), going someplace exciting.

It has recently come to my attention that this does not automatically happen.

My name is Aaron, and for eighteen years I've been trying to fight the drudge of reality with romanticism, all the while cursing my weapon for being only an illusion. This type of battle is one that keeps sprouting up -- in my life and in the lives I see around me -- and I can't help but think: is there such a thing as a redemption for those of us in this paradox mindset? Can we turn the dream into something we can look at, hear, kiss?

The internet, juggernaut of porn and (admitted funny) videos of people injuring themselves, might not seem at first glace to be the place for wandering vaguely into the depths of what it is to be here, on this little planet. But I think the internet -- funny, stupid, all-encompassing, golden and shit-colored at once -- is actually the perfect place for finding what exactly will put that eternal smile on our face once we all wander on to the next stop on whatever ethereal bus ride we're on.

My favorites:

Movies: Memento, Adaptation, The Life Aquatic With Steve Zissou, Super Troopers, Big Fish, Schindler's List, Anchorman

Music: Radiohead, Sigur Ros, Pink Floyd, Zero 7, Air, Explosions in the Sky, Beck, Christopher O'Riley, The Beatles, The Who

Books: Catch-22, The Old Man and the Sea, Bel Canto