My best friend gets a temporary break away from her newborn children, so she invites me to join her for a round of golf. It was just a little too late for us to finish all 18 holes. We had to skip two of them. In spite of that, it was wonderful.

For example: on the second hole, I scored a birdie. A pretty darn good one, too. On the green in one stroke. And even though I was about as far away from the hole as one could get while still being on the green, I managed to sink it in one putt. It was beautiful! The ball rolled with just enough strength to ride up a slight gradient on the green, and arc almost a full 90 degrees, riding back down towards the hole. With just enough force that it teetered on the brink of the cup for a heart-stopping moment before dropping in. Fucking sweet!

How could a totally casual game of golf get any better, huh? Well, not to be outdone, on the next hole my friend upstaged me big time. There was a dogleg to the right. She tried to hop across it. But, her ball was too low. Smack! She got a rabbit, to counter my birdie. That's not some obscure golf term or anything. I mean, her ball whacked a living, breathing rabbit!

Because you see, there were rabits and squirrels all over the greens as we played. It must've just been after their breeding season. They were so abundant and chirpy that I expected to see Snow White dancing out with a bird on her finger at any moment.

A few holes later, I had to assert my dominance over my friend once more. For good measure. So she thought she could challenge my pursuit of scores that were just "named" after animals by hitting real ones, instead. Did she? I showed her! There was a tree with a few branches stretching out, unfurling towards the heavens, way up overhead across the fairway. With my mighty 9 iron in hand, I shot my Titleist upward. I swear, from just the right angle, I made the tee look like the launch pad at Cape Canaveral. Just as the riffle noise of air blowing past the ball's dimples faded out, a loud knock echoed through the whole canyon. I can't say for sure. On account that I never found a body. (Corpus delicti, and what have you...) But with all the freaking chirping going on, if I didn't actually hit one squarely, I'm sure to have at least scared the crap out of some little birdy sitting in that tree.