Russell Greer.

How to describe Russell Greer. Specifically how to describe him in a way that won't attract his attention and cause him to sue Lord Bonci for hosting this WU.

Okay, here we go.

    Russell Greer is allegedly the reason Taylor Swift doesn't do meet and greets with randos anymore and is why she likely sleeps with a gun under her pillow. Here's an example of some of his Facebook shenanigans.
    Russell Greer is allegedly the shining example why "paralegals" aren't the same as "lawyers" in the US legal system.
    Russell Greer is allegedly proof of the adage that "it's what's on the inside that counts," because the inside of him is allegedly made of a thick layer of sludge. Likewise for the adage, "you are more than your disability," because nobody on God's green earth hates Russell for his Mobius Syndrome, but rather because he is allegedly a litigious nutjob-- his words, not mine.
Things that are not alleged about Russel, but are cold hard facts are thus:

Russell is also, in my opinion, a huge fuckin' perve, a total Nice Guy (the derogatory/sarcastic kind) has a serious case of the misogynist "angry-incels" going on.

Background?

Russell is paralegal, amateur musician, and chronic pro-se litigant with a disability called Mobius Syndrome, a form of partial facial paralysis that has resulted in him being unable to control his upper lip and part of his jaw. Stop. I know you are tempted to feel sympathetic towards him. Don't.

Until this year, he lived in Utah, but he has since moved to Nevada (three guesses why). He was adopted by his parents and has a twin sister, but she remained with their birth parents as only Russell was put up for adoption. Apparently his relationship with his birth family is pretty bad, as he states in his book (and in some Facebook comments that they don't get along. In the book, he blames mean internet trolls for ruining their relationship by harassing his family. In his older facebook posts (before the book and before he came to internet-attention), he blames them not liking him because of his disability.

In high school, he wrote a kill list in the boy's bathroom and was arrested and subsequently jailed for a few months. In his Why I Sued Taylor Swift book, he described the incident as him writing a vague threat on the wall, and some other kids coming by after he'd left and adding in the names and making things more hardcore.

Side note: according to his book, the reason he felt comfortable enough doing this was because he was going to the doctors to get his tonsils removed. He wasn't getting them removed because he had chronic tonsillitis, but because his parents had heard that if you removed a kid's tonsils, they would behave better. Make of that what you will.

In any case, people found the actual police report and it turns out Russell is a dirty rotten liar who did in fact threaten a bunch of kids who he didn't like, specifically one dude who was rude to him and a bunch of girls who had turned him down for dates (which is perfectly in keeping with his character as anyone who read his book would know).

His book also details such "Yeah, I believe that happened" events as the time that, while on his Mormon Mission, he and his mission buddies went to a brothel and slept with prostitutes, then he bragged about it on Facebook and nearly got them all kicked out of the church, or how he was an intern at the Utah Attorney General's office for about two months before getting fired for suing Farah Abraham. But it also includes "Russell you fuckin' liar" details like when Mexican gangsters implied to have been hired by Taylor Swift blows up Russell's encouraging lawyer friend with a car bomb and sends him to the hospital.

Russell's hobbies include hiring prostitutes, creeping them out, and then getting blocked by them when he tries stalking them, then bitching about it online (blue is him, pink is the girl). He also claims to have been robbed by a prostitute12.

He also stalked a girl online, started putting harassing comments on all her social media posts when she turned him down, and then when she committed suicide, he dedicated a page to her in his book against her family's specific wishes.

His other hobbies include trying and failing to get onto America's Got Talent, and then claiming he didn't get on because of discrimination (though there's no lawsuit for that one as far as I know).

And, his website hurts my eyes.

Assorted Lawsuits

Farrah Abraham

Russell tried to sue reality show personality Farrah Abraham because she liked a tweet of his. Specifically, Abraham had a "win a date" contest of some sort on twitter where people responded with why she should go on a date with them. Russell responded with a very cringey video that has since been deleted from Youtube (as Russell DMCA's everything about him). Abraham, or possibly the intern running her social media accounts, "liked" the tweet-- along with many others. Russell took this as confirmation that he had won and demanded that they go on a date. When Abraham didn't go out with him, he filed a lawsuit against her for false advertising.

The lawsuit was filed May 4 2016 and wasn't resolved until 2018, when it was dismissed with prejudice.

Ariana Grande

While at an Ariana Grande concert, Russell managed to get some king of backstage pass to see her, and he brought flowers for her. When security stopped him (because bodyguards tend to take umbrage with strangers approaching their clients with strange objects), Russell was bitter. He ranted on Facebook that this was an act of discrimination against the disabled. On Facebook, he posted a draft of the lawsuit for his followers to see, and people noticed the crux of the suit seemed to be that he was expecting Grande to compliment and interact with him, and she didn't.

He then shortly after filed the lawsuit against her in small claims court for discrimination, then tried to get news media to cover it and was upset when nobody would. Because Russell is (in my opinion) an attention seeking moron. Unlike Farrah's case, which the judge merely dismissed, this judge dismissed the case and awarded Grande 1,500$ in lawyers fees.

He also blamed her for her concert getting bombed a few years back.

The State of Utah

Russell, good Mormon boy that he is, tried to start a brothel in Utah-- Mormon capital of the world. He was under the mistaken idea that he was somehow permitted to do such a thing because when he filed for a business, he was allowed to call it a brothel in the title, not realizing that Utah law permits you to NAME your business just about anything, but that doesn't mean you can actually DO it without following proper procedures (Ex: I can start a business called Zeph's Guns, Drugs, and Booze, but I can neither sell guns nor booze unless I get the proper licensure, and drugs are entirely off the table).

He tried to raise money for the lawsuit on indiegogo, and got exactly zero donations.

In the lawsuit, he says that it is discriminatory to not allow disabled people to purchase sex, as in some cases it's the only way they are able to get companionship. He also accuses Utah of being hypocritical (as sex toy shops and whatnot are legal). The case got the attention of actual sex-worker advocates and groups, whose opinions appear to be that, while they agree it should be legalized, Russell isn't going about it the best way.

The lawsuit was struck down in 2018.

Taylor Swift

This is the big one (or rather big two or three. I think we're on mach three at this point).

Russell Greer wrote Taylor Swift a song. Because he has difficulty speaking with his disability, he hired a singer to sing it for him. He tried and failed to raise money for this endeavor, by the by. The song he wound up with is called "I Get You, Taylor Swift" (found here), and he claims that it took him over two years to write. According to his book, Russell was deeply unhappy with the singer's voice, but still tried to get the song to Swift anyways, hoping that she would see past it and they could work on music together.

It should be noted, in his book, he claims up and down his motivations were never to get a date with Taylor Swift, despite constantly describing how he would like to go on a date with her.

In any case, Swift's agent sent a letter back to Russell stating that Swift doesn't accept music from fans. This is a very common and often necessary practice for famous musicians; if Beyoncé listened to a fan's song, and then accidentally happened to release a song that sounds like it, even if it was genuinely a coincidence, that fan now has a potential legal action and could sue for some kind of infringement. Instead of accepting this and then giving her some other gift (or, you know, moving on entirely), Russell contacted her agents and tried to explain himself, only to be turned down again. Here's Russell complaining about the song he wrote for her and how Swift's agents cock-blocked him on Facebook.

This was when Russell decided to take her to small claims court, which was a fucking disaster.

He was suing Swift for negligence, and his argument was that that Swift, as the employer of her managers, ought to have had better oversight over them so that they wouldn't have turned down his gift. No, you are fine if you don't get that; that line of thinking doesn't make any sense to anyone except Russell. He admits in his book and the filing that he did the lawsuit for get Swift to pay attention to him. Then, at the actual court date, he wasn't able to display his "evidence" because he forgot an HDMI cable, and he was pissed that Taylor Swift didn't show up to some small-claims case in fuckin' Utah herself, but instead sent legal representation.

His case was dismissed.

In 2018, he tried again, this time suing her for 100 million dollars. Entire document linked here. It's 91 pages long.

The issues brought up boil down to misrepresentation and negligence. Because Taylor had accepted gifts from other fans (including some girls who folded 1989 paper cranes for Swift's mother who was battling cancer-- which Russell is really really salty about), Russell argues that he was mislead by Swift's actions into thinking that she would accept gifts from him. At several points in the suit and in his book, he argues that famous celebrities ought to have disclaimers, or he argues that celebrities already are required to have disclaimers, and Swift violated hers. His reasoning for the second one involves a complete misunderstanding of product representation laws; celebrities do have to have a disclaimer if they're selling you a product. Nevertheless, Russell has stated that Swift accepting gifts from some people and turning down his was negligence because she didn't take care to ensure people wouldn't be misled by her being kind to fans. He's also trying to gain compensation because of all the emotional distress suing Swift has caused him. That's right: people are laughing at Russell because he sued Taylor Swift for stupid reasons and he wants to sue her because his feelings are hurt.

In my opinion, the man is insane.

However, it is likely Taylor never even knew this suit existed, and not just because she has a team of legal counselors whose main job is to smooth this sort of stuff over without her knowledge, but because Russell never served her.

To sue someone, you have to take reasonable steps in order to serve them the documents-- basically telling them that they are being sued. If the person clearly knows they're going to be sued and is trying really hard to dodge servicing, the court can usually give some wiggle room (I've heard of cases where the person bought a page in the newspaper and that constituted as the defendant being served).

However. Taylor Swift was not dodging service. Russell was just incompetent. He sent the papers to the wrong legal team, a law firm that used to represent Swift. But then, instead of checking that they still actually represented her, he considered the job done and didn't realize the mistake until it was too late.

And then, as of march of this year, we have Mach Three, which is only 25 pages this time and rehashes the "Taylor was nice to other people and that tricked me" argument. He also includes Exhibits of Taylor being nice to other people, just to drive home the point.

Miscellaneous

Russell, as a litigious monster, has also sued or otherwise threatened litigation against many other people. Currently, he is suing Joshua Moon, owner of the Kiwi Farms forum, which is a gossip website dedicated to e-stalking exceptional individuals on the internet.

Previously, he also became legally entangled (I don't think it was a full blown lawsuit, but I am not certain) with a prostitute from the Bunny Ranch brothel in Nevada. Greer details the incident in his book; he paid a hooker for three hours, but then instead of immediately going to hanky the panky, he took her out to eat at Olive Garden.

As you do.

Russell burned out the clock at dinner with the woman, and when they got back to the brothel, she refused to actually sleep with him since his time was up. Russell threw a hissy fit, and the end result was that he got a refund, but he was also banned from returning-- at least he was banned for a while. I admittedly am not certain if he is still banned, especially since he's apparently moved to Nevada, and that was his sole reason for visiting the place.

Fun Fact: a lawyer named Greg Skordas was Ariana Grande's lawyer, then was Taylor Swift's lawyer. Russell hates his guts and portrays him highly unfavorably in his book. In real life, apparently Russell sent harassing emails to both Skordas and his daughter, so now Russell is on Skordas' radar.

In September of this year Russell was charged with, and pled guilty to, electronic communications harassment of a girl named Erika. Erika's representation? Greg Skordas, who apparently agreed once he heard Greer was involved.

The End?

Russell is an ongoing story. Even now, he has two lawsuits going (Swift and Moon), and he's in the middle of dealing with the fallout of the harassment charges (which includes probation and a mental health evaluation). I assume there's going to be a follow up node in like five years when they find out he's got a pile of dead sex workers in his basement.

Allegedly.