Oh... but I am afraid that the

conspiracy is much more

dire then that.

In ancient Greece, people like Pythagoras wouldn't be put into a crude prison, but a crude mental asylum. You see, Pythagoras would stay up, racking his brain at night figuring out how to screw mathematics over forever. Greek mathematicians, well aware that keeping things simple for future generation, didn't even want to think about numbers that couldn't be expressed by other numbers. But not only did Pythagoras hate the sensible mathematicians of that Era, he hated them to the point of worship. After inventing his Pythagorean Theorem, he founded a cult based on the worship of messy mathematics. All of his members were to place a pentagram on their hands, which represents the natural constant E, rival in messiness only to PI. Anyway, his stupid formula forces children not only to learn some of the boringest mathematics ever invented, but also planar geometry, multi-dimensional geometry, continuous compound interest, and all sorts of mathematics some potential office guy needn't really concern himself with.

I swear this is true. They forced my 7th grade math class to watch this horrible algebra propaganda video by Disney starring Donald Duck (that would be "Donald Duck Goes To Mathemagic Land", thanks bob the cow). I'm pretty sure that teacher must have had a star tattooed on his hand...