May 17, 2001 (idea)

BEWARE: Large mass of rambling prose ahead.
Press <spacebar> to continue...

I have a lot, non-girl related, on my plate too though. My CS project, referred to in some previous daylogs, is due on Friday. I will be getting extremely minimal sleep between now and then, probably to the point of hallucination, since I've already been up 24 hours now. Worse, it won't be that great, because it's rushed and because my code could be about 100x better and 100x more polished than it is now.

But I'll cut to the quick. This girl knows about this site, and may even read this at some point, but that doesn't really matter. She'll possibly complain at me - but then I'm fairly anonymous and she's very anonymous, so she has no right to really :)

Part of the reason for being as behind on my project as I am is her. I met her out clubbing a few weeks ago and we chatted there and became friends - at least of the sort you only see when you're out. One time, I asked for her number and we arranged to go out for a drink - this was last Thursday. It went very well - much better than either of us expected considering we were effectively strangers. I knew she had a boyfriend and so this was only ever something we did as friends.

Thing is, we proceeded to spend most of the next 4 days (up until yesterdayish) together, or on the phone, or texting each other. I saw her for what must've been three 10 hour stints, including one time she came over to mine at 1:30 am and we stayed up, talking, until 11:00 am when she had to leave.

There was clearly sexual tension between us, and sometime during the four days I commented that it was a shame she had a boyfriend. She backed off slightly and said she really didn't full on fancy me, and that she did love her boyfriend although she admitted there was the aforementioned tension and that we did get on extremely well. I didn't expect anything else - after all, I knew she loved her boyfriend and was moving in with him (and others) in a few weeks. I only mentioned it because I wondered if my feelings were reciprocated. I'm glad I did too, because otherwise I'd always be wondering... The point is, if they're not, why do we spend such an insane amount of time together?? (and not in any way all at my arrangement).

Since then we have talked a lot and she has basically admitted that there is something between us, and she has even had to withold information from her boyfriend about the amount of time we have spent together - even though nothing at all has happened. Last night, whilst slightly drunk on the phone, she admitted she kinda missed me (we haven't seen each other for 2 days(!)), but didn't understand why. I don't know how honest she's been with me, considering she is saying slighty different things when drunk - so I shall just have to sit back and see what happens. At the moment, just being friends is enough so I'll see what happens after my exams. Considering she has a long-term boyfriend I'm not sure what can happen, but I'll be sure to keep you posted.

Lastly, as fondue noted yesterday, we think it's a good idea to soon have another...

London Noder Gathering
Monkeys may be optional... but Jaffa Cakes are most definately not.
/msg me or fondue if you're interested and we'll set up a node for it soon.