1) Walk into a store. Look for isle or display where condoms are. If you can't find them, quietly ask an employee when you can find them.

2) Take the time to look at the display--without blushing. What's the big deal, anyways? Make sure you get what you WANT. Don't grab a latex condom in your hurry to avoid being 'caught' if you know you are allergic to latex. It's not worth it. Don't get a product that's not the right one for you! Get the right size, texture, lubed/unlubed, spermacide or not, etc.

3) Walk to checkout. Pay. Leave.

Seriously, if buying a condom is more emotional involvement than you can handle, should you really be having sex? If you're too shy to buy a bit of rubber are you really brave enough to face another real live human being naked?

There is the one-step version for the painfully shy, however:

1) Go to a run-down hole in the wall gas station. Pray there's a condom machine in the bathroom. But will you really be any less embarassed, in the long run, when your partner notices it's glow-in-the-dark green and cantalope scented?

giving bad (and potentially harmful) advice is hardly what i'd call giggles. Whatever.