So I shaved my head. I went from 18" to 0" in half an hour. As I consider it my personal duty to maintain my general strangeness level so as to keep the masses from being too bored with their daily lives, I made the bold decision to remove all hair from my cranium (excluding eyebrows anyway).

A simple question comes to mind: why does this change my assumed political affiliation? While the occasional "hippie!" was heard when travelling through the rural or southern areas of the country, I didn't get too much slack for having 1 1/2' black hair. But all of a sudden I get strange looks from minorities and white folks alike now that I decided to run a razor over my head. I mean it's not like I feel like I'm being victimized here--I just don't like having people assume I hate them from the start. I feel pretty awful knowing that some people feel afraid of me, rather than having the urge to beat the living crap out of my skinny, pale ass. I am a generally very friendly, reserved guy with reasonably little hatred toward anyone, especially on the basis of skin color or appearance, and yet all of a sudden I am assumed to have a big poster of Der Fuhrer on my wall.

The entire situation has come as something of a surprise to me. While I never had any doubts about the xenophobic tendencies of most people, I wouldn't have thought that there was such a McCarthyist movement to root out the hordes of racists and bigots in our society.

Of course this also means I can't be horribly politically incorrect for cheap laughs anymore. That's a shame too. Guess I'll have to find my old Dead Kennedys T and start wearing it again, just to affirm that I was at least once a rabid lefty.

In reference to the instructional section below, be sure, if you have incredibly long hair, to *trim it first*. I realized, before shaving, that this would probably be intelligent, but my decision making process tends to favor convenience over wisdom. Getting your hair nice and short first will save you a lot of cuts and scrapes.