Ozium - the "Glycol-ized Air Sanitizer"

Ozium is, quite simply put, the greatest air freshener I've ever encountered, ever. EVER. All you do is buy this little blue & white can (or it actually comes in a few "scents" these days, but I just stick with good ol' blue & white "Original Scent" which smells like air once it has run its course) and you spray it towards the center of a room for one second. Be sure to spray it away from any drapes, walls, plastic, vinyl, painted surfaces, animals, baked goods, radioactive materials, etc. for best results. As near as I can tell, one spray of Ozium releases all these Sanitizer Particles into the air. And no, these aren't any ordinary Sanitizer Particles... nonono, these are like some kind of Special Assault Sanitizer Particle Unit (SASPU) that tracks down all those renegade smoke and odor particles in the air, and eliminates them ruthlessly and without mercy... using nothing less than sophisticated thermal imaging scanners, night vision goggles, flamethrowers, rocket-propelled grenades, motion-activated anti-personnel mines, and even the occasional limited tactical nuclear strike if they think they can get away with it.

Almost needless to say, humans and domestic animals should avoid inhaling the spray mist that comes out of this little can of power. And indeed, the contents are under pressure, so don't you be punching holes in the can, or tossing it into a fire, or storing it on top of the furnace or anything like that. And this was important enough to go on the can: "Not to be refilled. Wrap in newspaper and put in trash."

Ozium is Manufactured for Medo Industries, Inc.
Tarrytown, NY 10591-5123
Copyright 1997 Medo Ind.

Ozium is a registered trademark of Medo Industries, copyright 1997


The only problem with Ozium is that it's expensive... about $4 a can where I'm from. But, it's well worth the cost. This is the only air freshener you will ever need...

...and it's perfect for pot-smokers!!!