Joshua Harris writes about abstinence and purity in I Kissed Dating Goodbye. Instead of traditional dating, Harris recommends that singles commit their life to God and wait for God to bring a partner into their life. He argues that courting is a much better model because traditional dating destroys the emotional purity of a person.

Furthermore, much of his argument is framed in terms of a question, “How would you like your future mate to be treated by other men/women?” Using this golden rule-like standard, Harris concludes that we should avoid even acts like kissing to maintain purity.

This book advocates a silly and unjustified limitation on behavior. The extrapolations made from the Bible are stretches at best and more than likely contrary to the intent of the text. Recently, a couple that followed this model spoke with me. They struck me as an incredibly unhappy couple that had little equality in their relationship. I do not recommend this model for relationships due to its exorbitant extremism.