Before writing this up, I knew I'd need a cup of coffee. Please bear with me, as what I'm about to write about has hurt me like nothing else.

Yes. Natalie. Her name was Natalie.
I met her through my brother, Bill. Bill told me how great she was, and that he wanted to go out with her. I smiled, happy for my brother, and eager to meet this girl I had heard so much of. The day I met her, she told me she was vegetarian. At first, I didn't think too much about her. I just thought she was a great girl, and I hoped my brother would be happy with her.

The day after I met her, my brother was trying to teach her how to skateboard. He would put one hand on her shoulder and one near her cute little ass. Then he would say, "Run, Natalie, Run." She would run and skateboard along. When my brother was off on the board on his own, I joked with her about him putting his hand on her butt. She laughed and I mocked the motion. As time went on, she started to come to see me in homeroom. I would smack her butt every time I saw her as a little joke. She would smile and laugh with me and say, "Would you stop that?"

Soon, she would call, and instead of asking for my brother, she would just talk to me. Time progressed, and so did our relationship. We grew close. She would sneak in my window at 1:30AM and stay until 3:00AM.

Everything was going very well, and we were slowly falling in love with each other. Then one day we were at one of her friend's house's, and she was begging her mom to let Natalie sleep over. Suddenly, she said, "Come on mom, she leaves in a month!" My smile fell quickly, and I could feel the color fading from my face. I walked away. I had known she was leaving for Chile for 10 months for a while, but I never imagined that she would leave in a month. Later, I asked her about it. She confirmed that she left in one month, one day. I said, "Oh".

And that was the beginning of a long, love testing journey, which has stretched me to my limit every day of my life since. Time passed, and I knew I wanted to tell her I loved her, but I couldn't find the right moment. My friend gave me suggestions, and listened to all my bitching. I am very grateful for what he's done for me. Then one day, we were online and she said, "Natalie loves you!!!". I said "Who's this?", as I thought it was someone else, due to the third person reference. She said "It's me" and I said, "I love you too".

Two weeks before she was to leave, she left for Niagra Falls for a week. I then learned, first hand, how bad the next 10 months were going to hurt. Those two weeks were hell for me.

I tried to spend as much time as possible with her. After she got back from her week in Niagra Falls, she saw me every single day for the last week she was here, except the last day. The first day I saw her of that last week, I bought her a $400 diamond necklace. The last time we saw each other, we thought we were going to meet again, but she left early the next day. She cried, and I cried. That was August 12, 2000. It is now August 22, 2000.

Through the help of friends, I have come to appreciate what she's given me. We still talk every day through e-mail, and we both eagerly anticipate the day we can see each other again. I love that girl.