Tunnel vision. I hadn't spoken to him since we broke up. I hadn't even spoken to him when we broke up. One day I just put down the phone and it was over. Later I let myself in and left the key on the coffee table. No note.

The lobby of a movie theatre I've been to dozens of times before and since wasn't around me that moment. The walls were hollow, reverberating with the hot blush on my face. I felt immersed in burning acid.

He smiled. He was glad to see me. He looked so over me, sitting there over a beer with a friend. A male friend. I don't know what I would have done if it had been a woman.

I came over, I sat down, and for the rest of the conversation I tried to get a cigarette out of the wrong end of the pack. All my energy was directed towards just keeping myself upright and breathing. I don't remember what we talked about.