I want to jump out of my skin and have a convulsion.
Tonight, I had the privledge to attend a talk that has opened my eyes about me. About one of my biggest insecurities, period. I found a part of me that's been missing for a long, long time.
You ready to hear it?
Okay, here goes....
I've learned that I need to "let go" and use my unique ability to be a friend to the people in my life, especially those who I get involved in business with. And KEEP and MAINTAIN the friendship.
I fear that people won't want to remain friends with me because of all the negative things I think about myself. I superimpose (or project) my feelings onto them. I think "they won't like me because_____________." when it's really myself disliking me that I'm talking about.
And I know how to fix me too. I got to ditch the little voice that spews all this insecure crap that says "Why would they want to be friends with you once they get to know you?? You aren't _________________ or _____________ and you don't have _________________ and don't act like ____________."
It's amazing how much lighter I feel- spiritually, mentally, emotionally... I've faced the truth, and it didn't hurt. Even better yet, writing it down has cemented it. If I had just kept it in, to myself, I would've reverted back to that insecure me. Now it's in my face, and I can't go back. And quite frankly, I don't want to.