user since
Fri Nov 30 2001 at 01:19:14 (16.6 years ago )
last seen
Tue Jan 8 2002 at 01:40:09 (16.5 years ago )
number of write-ups
1 - View SuperJesus's writeups (feed)
level / experience
0 (Initiate) / -11
mission drive within everything
Conversion and Snakehandling while making bobby pin tracking devices
Undefinable with your puny so called "minds"
I can turn water into vodka - oh wait, it was vodka to begin with
most recent writeup
Jelly Belly
Send private message to SuperJesus

I have a severe tendency to dip in and out of consciousness. My name, dear friends, is THE SUPER JESUS . Don't hate me becuase I'm egomaniacal. Hate me becuase I love clocks and anything time worthy, such as sewing booties for the local homeless pocket elves, namely, Pocket Elf Number 77 (A.K.A. the COLINATOR). Globes are my specialty and by globes, I mean "GLOBES". One day I went to sleep and when I woke up and a light appeared above my head. The light never vanished and so I surmise that I am the reincarnation of Jesus' friend who was also named Jesus, except he was slightly shorter. Some think me schizophrenic, but rest assured they be banished to the firey depths of hell ("na na na na na na"). Deoderant MEANS Deoderant for Christ's sake, and by Christ I mean me, and by me, I mean my friend Jesus. Does anyone recall how very pretentious cheese balls insist on being? I do.

Here is one of my most favorite poems made by me, SUPERJESUS :

No, seriously. I'm a pretty happy person. But I saw this one boxing glove last week and boy was it red. This portly guy was at led lobster and he started running books. I was like, 'YOW ZAH! You're running books.' He told me to stop singing him. I slipped on his shoes.


or: the introduction of, dare we say it?…the SHMALLOW

Contrary to popular opinion, there is in fact a taboo topic on E2. It has nothing to do with sex or religion or politics or various combinations of those. This topic has been strictly suppressed by the administration on this Website for as long as possible, but on December 4th, a courageous noder had the audacity to introduce it in his/her silent corner of level one. That person was SUPERJESUS. That topic was the shmallow. The effect that the introduction had was more significant and far-reaching than the infamous E2 civil war. So what is the shmallow? You might ask yourself. While there is no adequate definition of the term, we know that Little Susie F. likes to smear shmallows on her desk at school and that some like to sink into big ones after a hard day at the office. Only a few people at E2 have seen the node called “Shmallow” and while SuperJesus has considered rewriting it, fear of threats from powerful noders has kept him/her at bay. Much like retirees waiting for the daily mail, the administration is ready to pounce on this node at the right time. On that day another controversial subject was raised and that was falling water. Falling Water was an interpretive poem by SuperJesus detailing the social injustice of an unjust regime’s mind games directed toward possible rabble-rousers. The poem was deleted immediately along with shmallow once the hidden meanings were discovered. While the poem in it’s entirety cannot be re-written, the follow excerpt has been saved for your eyes:


I'm going to wax my ass
and slide down a hill
and crash into a tree
damn the rice cake monsters!
damn them!