I'm not feeling too well today. Exhausted might be a better word for it. I've been studying for my
Psychology and
Microeconomics midterms. I'm not worried as much about my
Microeconomics but my classmates seem to depend on me for some answers on the study guide. Flattering to say the least, annoying on the other. The amount of typing that I've done today made me feel that I'm one of those infinite monkeys in that weird
infinite monkey theorem. In that case, at least it might lead to something useful after the end of the day.
I studied until 6 in the morning, with the fog on my windows forming, as I breathed close to them. As I was about to head off to bed, I spilled my one liter mug of
ovaltine all over my notes. Infuriated, I stomped off to bed, without cleaning up. I woke up at noon, only to see that the mess has spread all over my table. Took me 10 minutes to clean but the idea that almost fifteen pages of handwritten notes have to be handwritten again angers me to new levels. I quickly showered, changed for work and headed out for a quick lunch.
Lunch went quickly, with the crappy Chinese food from
RPM swallowed almost whole. On my way to work, some jerk on a cell phone while driving almost hit my car and had the nerve to finger me. I was thinking at the time whether I'm like that when I'm driving. Its been a really crappy week, and I'm simply not in the mood.
I got to work, and I didn't realize that I had a bottle of
ASA in my backpack. Being deathly allergic to it, I placed it back when I got to thinking. What if I was no longer allergic to it? What if it simply was a childhood allergy that I grew out of? So I did what any
simpleton would do and took 2 aspirins. I had a migraine anyways. Either way, I win. I don't get sick, I get rid of my
migraine. I do get sick, I miss work, midterms and get to chill in the hospital for a while. Either way.
My manager called me up to his desk when I got there. I was wondering whether a customer complained about his/her infernal
Ikea lamp. He sat me down and explained that my hours will be further cut down to almost 8 to 9 hours a week the coming holiday season. Great. More great news. With the holiday season coming up and a holiday that I've been saving up for a while, I either have to give up my meager nightlife, composed of drinking
slurpees and playing
Counterstrike or my
cell phone and the
internet. Another
extreme measure would be to simply get another job but that's not an option right now. More great news.
4 hours later, and still I was alive. I guess it was a childhood allergy, or I simply didn't take enough. That's okay. That will be done for another day. I studied throughout my breaks, when I realized that Jennifer came to work. I'm simply astonished at how attractive she is, but today, the demeanor that she displayed was less than energetic to say the least. I don't say much other than say hi and offer her a
mentos. She smiled politely and I walked off. Freshmaker my patootie.
Almost quittin' time, I took my last break. I stood outside, simply pondering life's little questions. While petty to some people, it wasn't like that for me. It's simply so much easier to believe that the world is a much more complicated place or that other people have more difficult problems. My problem isn't the fact that I don't understand that there are bigger problems in the world but rather that I simply don't care about other people right now. I headed down to swipe out when Jen came up and told me to chat with her. So I took another break, during company time of course, to talk to her. I tried small talk but to no avail. The direct method worked as she simply told me that she broke up with her taiwanese boyfriend recently. Thinking that she had an
affinity for
caucasian males, I kept my surprise inside. I played the role of listener while paying attention to the eye contact and body language. My childish hopes simply elevated to unreasonable heights and I walked her back to the returns desk. I finished my work, and headed off to the car.
Outside, in the cold, I saw some asian guy with flowers. I thought it was her ex-boyfriend. Damn. I simply bowed my head and looked up at the sky. It was like that
Kodak commercial. Everything just looked perfect, like the parking lot. I picked up my sisters, and we picked up my mom. We came home and I studied for a couple of hours.
My buddy Kalabaw, or
Water Buffalo in English, asked me to talk to his dad. He simply needed my "assistance" to speak to his dad about impregnating his underage girlfriend. I've been there for him in high school, when he ran away, got ditched by his friends. His dad seems to have a respect for me and he's gonna use me as a tool. I suppose. I don't feel much about it anymore.
I seriously hope that there isn't much else that can go wrong this week. I simply rather not have to deal with this
negativity.
Lashing out isn't an option at this point in time. First my friends believe that I'm going out with someone because I didn't tell them who I was going with (which I realize might simply be an overeaction on my side), then some of my friends suddenly stopped calling. I can't call them simply because their parents won't allow them. I don't know what else. I'm
ranting. What else is new. Screw it. I'll downvote this thing myself. One good turn deserves another.
Silence can mean more than words....Day can be engulfed by night....The solution?....Say nothing at night....