My dad's out of town for a week, so I figure I'll take the jet ski to the lake and relax a little.

It takes me ten minutes to hitch it to the truck, because the hitch is broke. I fix it, and get under way.

I get to Lake Lewisville, where it costs $5 to get in. There's nobody working the fee shack, and there aren't any envelopes in the payment box. I figure screw it, I'm only going to be here an hour, and drive through.

There's nobody on the lake. A joyous day for me.

I put the jet ski in the lake, park the truck, and go climb on.

It won't start. It would appear I don't have enough battery to get it going. By now, I've drifted far enough out that I'd have to swim it back. Off I go.

I tie it to the dock and go get the truck. The lake is so high this year that I'm walking on what used to be a picnic area. I fall in some kind of underwater pit and gouge my leg open.

I get the truck, back the trailer in, and load up. I'm off.

I get home, un-hitch the jet ski, and back it into the garage. I feel fine the whole time, but once I put the front of the trailer down, my back and right arm suddenly hurt.

I'm just going to go lay on the couch for the rest of the day so I don't get killed by a falling plane or runaway cement truck.

As I was turning to leave after writing this, I banged my left elbow into my desk and it is now bleeding. Somebody please save me.