Today was a fun day. I went to Hot Topic with my friend and her mom. I wish me and my mom were as close, but she simply adores my sister and barely listens to me. I've tried to tell her this, with tears streaming down my face and her laughing at me and telling me how stupid I am to think that way. Nothing has changed since that night.

I love my sister, but she always gets all the attention. Whenever we are with company or family, they all pay attention to her. "Oh what major are you in?" and lots of questions like that. For me its more like, "How old are you?" and then the talk slowly turns onto my sister again. I'm smart. I get decent grades and yes, I may dress a little funny, but thats just the way I am.

When I went to New York to see some relatives that I haven't seen in 10 years, the girl cousin that I thought was really nice, glared at me. She seemed to really like my sister. She glared at me and sized me up. Everytime I'd try to talk to her, she'd look like she was going to spit on me.

My grandmother is being a pain in the ass, as usual. And this is the first time in months that I have written here, and I am really rusty.