I'm walking down the overgrown, wooded back alley behind my old house in Pennsylvania with my mom and my little sister. I am taking them out to see the wolves, because we want to catch one for dinner. So we are walking, overlooking the small hill, and at the bottom I see a wolf. I point it out to my mom and run after it, believing she will follow me and help me catch it. The wolf doesn't run away, but stands and faces me. I turn to make sure my mom is behind me......she isn't. She and my sister have scurried home.
I think to myself, I can't take this wolf all by myself, so I run. The wolf starts chasing after me. I run up between some houses and zig zag so the wolf doesn't know which direction I am going. The wolf calls out to me, and I am so utterly surprised to hear a wolf speak that I say, "What?" The wolf now knows which direction I am going, but I successfully zig zag again. Once again the wolf says something to me. I don't remember what it was, but it pisses me off, so I feel the need to comment back. And again, the wolf knows where I am.
I am one house away from my own home. I know that the wolf is between me and my house and that I must confuse it and get it to go one more house over so I can double back. A third time the wolf cries out to me. I know I shouldn't answer it, that I probably will not make it home if I answer it, but goddamn it, I want to answer. So I do. I am standing face to face with the wolf. Then suddenly, I am inside my living room skinning the wolf (which surprisingly has only 3 chicken sized bones and no inards...) on my parents' beloved oriental carpet. I go to wipe sweat off my forehead and smear blood all over myself. Calling into the next room for my mom, I tell her that I am alright and that I got the wolf for dinner. She tells me, "Oh? We were just joking before, we didn't really want to have wolf for dinner. We ordered out for Chinese." The biting irony.
I look back at the mess of blood and fur on the carpet and it spontaneously incinerates then evaporates, and the blood from my hands and face is gone.