My relationship with my feelings until recently was somewhat out of synch--like trying to have a coherent conversation through the time delay of a shitty long distance connection.
I should have known that I was still in love with my ex-lover when it was so important to me to avoid walking past her with my new lover.
I should have known that, while she might have been “in” love with me, the new girlfriend didn’t love me, when her first question to the doctor was how soon after surgery we could have sex.