I know you are but what am I is the ultimate comeback for kids below the third grade. When a group of kids (mostly males) get together with minimum supervision, they start to pick on each other (in an Alpha Dog way). Scathing soul-shattering insults will be hurled back and forth like this:

  • First kid: "You're a doo-doo head."

  • Second kid: "You wet the bed."

  • First kid: "You kissed your sister."

  • Second kid: "You're a gorilla's butt." (major laughter from surrounding crowd... major score!)

  • First kid: "I know you are, but what am I?"

    Now, no matter what the second kid says, the speaker of the ultimate comeback will just deflect any insult right back to the source. After four or five futile attempts, the second kid gives up in a huff, mentions "That's so lame!", then wanders off to throw dirt at the icky girls.