I went out last night. For some reason my systers always call me at the last minute, as if I were an afterthought. Which really messes with my mind considering I like to have some vague idea of what lies before me in the near future. I didn't even know they were back from their vacation. Then another surprise when they showed up at my house with way more people than I was expecting.

We picked up another of our friends who lives in College Station, and then ate Chinese food and went... bowling. I definitely don't see the amusement in bowling. I don't bowl. I watch. This usually draws arguments and complaints. Mostly it's just that I hate spending money, most of all on things that are definitely not worth the cost. They had a blast. I laughed. And stared off into the distance a lot. I think I have the inability to be spontaneous. I think I'm missing some vital part of the human psyche.

Jessie asked me to spend the night. But she had to get up at five in the morning, and she needed to get sleep. She wondered why I declined. Seriously, I want to be with her, but it isn't worth the inconvenience of temporarily relocating just to be under the same roof. I want to talk to her, to share experiences with her. Sure, I could amuse myself. But I want attention! I need to be comforted! I'm tired of being told how much I matter, and treated like I don't.

Maybe I should stop listening to country music.