From The Wall Street Journal of Friday, April 4th, "Multinational Firms Take Steps To Avert Boycotts Over War":

One of the most concerted attacks has been against Coca-Cola Co., whose competitors in parts of the Arab world are seeking to paint Coke as the soft-drink of the infidel.

Now, I don't know about you but I think "The soft drink of the infidel" is one hell of a slogan. I understand though that this would lead to a sharp decrease in sales in areas with large Muslim populations, so obviously rather than embracing this portrayal Coke needs to come up with a more Islam-friendly ad campaign. Like a laughing shaykh hoisting a bottle with the caption: "Followers of the Prophet love Coke!" Or: "All praise due to Allah...and Coke!"

Cynical? Well, say what you will Mister and Miz Armchair Soda Advertising Campaign Critic, but at least this American has a plan for winning the hearts and minds of the residents of this most volatile of regions back to the greatest soft drink (or "soda" as all right-thinking people call it) the world has ever known. When you come up with your own campaign for putting ice-cold bottles of Coke in the hands of dusky moppets all over the Arab world, you just give me a call.

By which I do not literally mean, "Give me a call." The last thing I want is for people to ring my home phone in the middle of the night telling me about their ideas re: Coca-Cola. Buncha freaks.