Feng Shui is also a powerful
martial art, practiced mostly in northwest
California. Crack teams of trained Feng Shui ninjas will invade your home while you are away, and using great subtlety, rearrange your furnishings
just so such that your life and everything in it will just
go to hell. Afterwards, your
love life will be ruined, you'll
lose your job, your car will
spontaneously combust(1) , and you will find yourself unsatisfied by your meals, despite putting on tremendous amounts of extra weight. This is not a
martial art to be trifled with...
(1) This actually happened to a friend of mine. Granted it was a
1978 Chevrolet Caprice Classic, but that's not the point...