Seen this morning (October 17, 2001) as a banner ad on CNN.com:

All-New AOL 7.0
1000 FREE Hours!
for 45 days

Let's do the math here.

24 hours in a day.
45 days
to use 1000 hours

24 * 45 = 1080

There are 1080 hours in 45 days. Under this offer from AOL, you have 1000 hours to use in 45 days. This leave a difference of 80 hours.

You would have to spend every waking moment on AOL, while getting only 1.7777777777777777777777777777778 hours of sleep per night. If anyone would actually manage to use all 1000 hours of this offer within the allotted 45 days, there are three possible assumptions I can think of.

POSSIBILITY 1

You have 2 or more people using different screen names. This is actually the most likely, most sane, and least harmful possibility. Since only one person can be logged into a particular account, even with different screen names, these would have to be people that are up during different hours, and taking turns online.

POSSIBILITY 2

Either you have a case of serious insomnia, or you have extreme disipline when it comes to sleep depravation. In either case, you'd have a serious sleep deficit, and a profoundly fucked circadian rhythm.

POSSIBILITY 3

You need to cut back on your quite serious meth habit. tweaker Suck.


In closing, you can't yet sue AOL for false advertising, as it is technically possible to use 1000 hours of service in 45 days. However, in the case of Possibility 2, can you sue them for physical and emotional harm from trying to use all 1000 hours? "Your honor, I was trying to get the most for my money." *twitch* *twitch*