Discofever, you're a cultureless boor.
Dwelling on my incomplete month-after meet review, my fancies of slumber turn to the future, to an assuredly greater EverythingConvention lurking in our future as near as this upcoming summer.
Ornate and intricate plans are laid out - arrangements made with local world-class businesses to ensure only the best available for my international and cross-continental visitors, activities plotted out and booked both representing the best of Vancouver and unavailable anywhere else in the world.
As the day approaches the preparations are finalised and confirmed. People aren't just going to write reviews of this meet, they're going to tell their grandchildren about it.
The last few ticks of the minute hand pass and from all four cardinal points, almost as if choreographed, they arrive, on time and unhassled. Introductions are made, greetings exchanged, formalities impeccably extended.
But my guests must be weary from their long and arduous voyages! Come, let us hie us to...
What was that, discofever? You want to go to Denny's? But we have at our disposal the finest sorbettos and this amazing Saltspring goat cheese...
No, listen - the only factor Denny's has is that it's consistent; it'll taste the same no matter where in the world you go. It's not good, it's merely familiar. No surprises. You can always eat there at some other time in your hometown, while here we have this amazing and unique...
What, now bones wants to go to Denny's too? But... but we have reservations for thirty! (sigh) Well, let us to the Denny's, then. But for afterwards I've gotten us tickets to this one-of-a-kind performance by internationally-renowned...
What, discofever? You want to go see Erin Brockovich instead? And now nate does too? But... but you can ogle Julia Roberts' gams in every movie theatre on the continent! While you're here in Vancouver wouldn't you prefer to do something you can't do anywhere else?
And take off that ridiculous hat!
in our last episode... | p_i-logs | and then, all of a sudden...