Jhonen Vasquez's (or should I say Johnny C.'s?) Happy Noodle Boy is a terrific character that is, at some times, more funny than the story it is inserted into. Every Noodle Boy comic deserves a good laugh, and usually gets one. The genius of the Noodle Boy is that there is NO plot at all, and none of the lines that he says are related to each other in the least bit.

Here are some notable things that have come out of the Noodle Boy's mouth-hole:

"Hey, dog entity! Rise up and bare your biscut filthy fangs at the oppressive leash wielding demon!! Goddamn my navel itches!! "

"Conspiracy!! And now employing juvenile mongoloid demon babies!! My famous chicken recipe will never be yours!! Grr! Woof!"

"Those kids are after me lucky charms!! Must get to my car and escape! Shit! Speed lines are chasing me!!"

"Cease your barky noise making!! Join my legion of darkness, my frown face empire!!"

"Go forth and become a happy cabbage!!! Your service is complete!! Get me some fucking corn nuts!!"

"Hail lord satan and his epileptic monkey!!"

"Mock me, you fried cyclops?!?!"1

"Je suis un très grande pomme de terre!"*

"Disperse all ye fucking people!! I am now the Noodle Boy that flies!!! I am like a flying potato!!"

"End this pathetic deception! I know you're hiding martians in your head!! Gimme them martians! I am going to put butter on them!! Martians!! Grrr!!"

"Timmy's in trouble!!"

"You is my elf-ho!"

"You remember this lesson I teach you!! Use it for GOOD!!! Use it on nachos!!! Hangnail!"

"Eggy-weggy oh so bright!! Eggy weggy. . . .FFUCK YOU SATAN!! I EAT YOUR TUNA!! SIZE SIX MY ASS!!"

"You deny me freshmaker?!?!?!?!?!?"

"My baloney does have a first name!! But I don't know what it is! That fuckin' baloney!!! I hate...ack!!"

"Fizzy neck warp pisses on bumpy groin pit!! I feel like chicken tonight, you fucking pez crumb!!! Don't make me turn this car around!!! Them's crabs, Willy!"

Ah, it would be bliss to share in one of Happy Noodle Boy's intelligent conversations...

1said to a doughnut.
*I am a very large potato.