Your best play by far to get rid of a tree stump involves nothing more than five pieces of wood (four of them being two to three feet long, and thin along the other dimensions), a hammer, and some nails. Four of the pieces of wood, you nail to the back of the stump so they stick up relatively straight from it, in a tightly distributed row. The fifth connects the other four across the top. Depending on how you angle the other four, the fifth may need to be cut to match their curvature, or bowed. Either way, once you're done, you don’t have a stump anymore at all. You have a woodland chair.

The next thing to do is to go sit in your woodland chair and read something, perhaps a short story by Shel Silverstein.