On the beginning of that day, at 2AM, we were in a disco. It was the day after graduation, we had been drinking the day before till 4 AM, and we had decided we would spend saturday evening till Sunday evening at Victor's apartment in the rich beach resort of Knokke, Belgium. It was a guys only party, the four of us, we would basically not do much more than drink and drink. When we had finished the beers after some drinking games, we went to a bar, "Le Scoop" and drank a Redbull-Vodka. We then proceeded to the disco.

After two hours of heavy shaking, and a couple of extra beers in my stomach, I had my epiphany. I knew what my problem with girls had been, and what it would always be :
I need months or years to fall in love with a girl.
This has many implications :
  • I will never fall in love with a girl I meet at a party : I won't even care enough about her to be interested in seeing her back the day after.
  • I can only fall in love with good friends I see on a daily basis. When I realise it, it is too late, I am fucked, no way out. One does not fall out of love with a girl after years like one does after a week. One can decide from one day to another : "In fact, that girl I met at Alfred's party sucks". You cannot make the same decision for someone you've known for years.
  • When I fall in love, it better should be reciprocal : I'm not gonna "break up" anyway (see above), even when there is no relationship, so there better IS one, else I stay ALONE, this being just the only self-consistant solution, as I am monogamous.

After the disco, around 4 AM, we walked back to the apartment to grab the last beers for drinking games on the beach. On our way, we saw people rolling a joint. I asked them if we could smoke with them, but instead they gave us the joint. We went to the beach, played the drinking games to make ourselves puke, the smoked the joint and went sleeping till 11 AM. We were basically stoned for the next two days. Never accept drugs from strangers !