I'm on my bike
. Like I have been, everyday, since middle school
. But today
, today. I look down, and see arms
. They are not the arms of a child
. But they are connected to my body
. My body is no longer a child's body. How did this happen? I was a child only yesterday, but today, today is different. When did I make the transition from boy to man
? My arms are
bigger now though...
I'm at a college, watching the passerbys. These are college kids, they are the pinnacle of all that was cool growing up. They drive, drink, smoke, live alone, and fuck. They do everything I couldn't for so many years. But they are no longer older than me. I am in their age group. Many of them think I'm a student there. I still consider them older than myself. My arms are bigger now though...
I drive my car through the city, and I get looks from kids walking and pedaling around, wishing they could drive. Wishing they were what I thought I could be when I was their age. Don't they realize that I'm just like they were, but older? No, they couldn't, because I didn't. They look at me, I'm one of the old kids they look up to. I used to be the one looking up. My arms are bigger now though...
I see a kid at school, walking by, looking very grown up and mature. He's got on all the cool clothes, and walks with a confident swagger. I wish I could be like that some day. Wait, I am like that. I wear the same things he does, and walk the same way. I have become that which I idolized, but I still feel like a boy. I still feel like I need to be home for dinner on time. My arms are bigger now though...