Tossing and turning
until maybe 1:30-2AM, then called in late to work. I can’t take a full day off, too much going on (as usual) this week; but catching up on a little sleep seemed more important than the morning at the factory, so ~7 I call in to say I'll be late. Then I slip back into dreamland
I wake again ~9:30, call in to say I’ll be there by 12, boss finds it necessary to remind me of all that’s going on. With the brief disorientation
of recovery from disturbed sleep, I feel a pang of desperation
: I miss Florida, can’t I just run away?
Given my druthers, I’d take the day off to wallow
in this grass-is-greener frustration
, indulge this hysterical paralysis
of will. I think I need to plan a vacation. A couple of phrases come to haunt me – "whatever you believe will seem to be true", and something about self-deception. I better sleep well tonight...