I'll describe the way I feel, weeping wounds that never heal.
Lately, I've been feeling more and more
disconnected.
Unplugged from
my own life, as though I was on the outside of a
window, looking in on
events I take no real part in. I
barely feel anything anymore, except
emptiness. This terrible
fear is nagging at me, tugging at my brain the way a small
child tugs her mother's skirt to gain
attention.
Everything is meaningless. Success, love, happiness, unattainable and worth nothing. Life means nothing.
Can the savior be for real, or are you just my seventh seal?
I can't pinpoint
when this started happening, when I lost
control, chose to step outside myself instead of take charge of
my own body,
my own mind.
Gravity, no escaping gravity.
I just want it to stop. I want to
feel again.
Pain,
pleasure, it doesn't matter so long as I
feel it. I want to be the one
steering this broken ship through the
waves of chance, even if it means crashing on the banks of
failure. I want to be the one at the helm when it crashes, not leave it open to
fortune,
who guides all ships astray.
I fall down, hit the ground, make a heavy sound.
I'm through pretending. It's time for me to
live the life
I want for myself.
I'll describe the way I feel, you're my new Achilles heel.
Can the savior be for real, or are you just my seventh seal?
No hesitation, no delay, you come on just like Special K,
just like I swallowed half my stash, I never, ever want to crash.
No hesitation, no delay, you come on just like Special K,
now you're back, with dope demand, I'm on sinking sand.
Gravity, no escaping, gravity,
I fall down
hit the ground
make a heavy sound
every time you seem to come around.