When even I'm offended, there's a problem . . .
So I was at one side of the family's celebration and there are a bunch of little
second cousins running around. Normally I'm the one
offending others by sometimes letting a swear word or
sarcastic comment slip in front of the little ones. Not this year.
The second cousins in attendance ranged in age from 3 to 9. And they were all down in the
basement watching the 9-year-old play Grand Theft Auto 3. Now, I know my relatives know what this game is. The parents of these kids are just a bit older than I am. They know the whole "point" of the game is to kill
hookers and steal things. Which is
hilarious, sure, but it's not a game for 3 to 9 year olds.
I'll start by giving a run down of the kids' names (with
pronounciation guide):
Tyveil ("Tie-vel")
Damon ("Day-mawn")
Tyron ("Tie-rawn")
Cayla or Crayla or Kyla or
whatever
Dante
Whyttnie ("Wit-nee")
So these kids are watching Tyveil beat and steal for awhile, and they're getting into it.
Then Tyveil drives towards a cop car, and little Cayla/Crayla/Kyla/whatever starts jumping up and down excitedly. In her high-pitch sweet little
kindergardener voice she yells,
"Pull him out of the car and beat him! Pull him out of the car and beat him!"
The older boys decide this is a
capital idea, and Tyveil pulls the cop out of the car and starts beating him. Now all the kids, right down to the 3 year old, start yelling,
"Stomp him! Steal his car! Yeah!"
Ugh. It says "
Mature" on the box for a reason, dammit.