When even I'm offended, there's a problem . . .
So I was at one side of the family's celebration and there are a bunch of little second cousins
running around. Normally I'm the one offending others
by sometimes letting a swear word or sarcastic comment
slip in front of the little ones. Not this year.
The second cousins in attendance ranged in age from 3 to 9. And they were all down in the basement watching the 9-year-old play Grand Theft Auto 3
. Now, I know my relatives know what this game is. The parents of these kids are just a bit older than I am. They know the whole "point" of the game is to kill hookers
and steal things. Which is hilarious
, sure, but it's not a game for 3 to 9 year olds.
I'll start by giving a run down of the kids' names (with pronounciation
Cayla or Crayla or Kyla or whatever
So these kids are watching Tyveil beat and steal for awhile, and they're getting into it.
Then Tyveil drives towards a cop car, and little Cayla/Crayla/Kyla/whatever starts jumping up and down excitedly. In her high-pitch sweet little kindergardener
voice she yells, "Pull him out of the car and beat him! Pull him out of the car and beat him!"
The older boys decide this is a capital idea
, and Tyveil pulls the cop out of the car and starts beating him. Now all the kids, right down to the 3 year old, start yelling, "Stomp him! Steal his car! Yeah!"
Ugh. It says "Mature
" on the box for a reason, dammit.