Well, the first variety of mice guy fancies mice as pets. Often he enjoys their silky fur or the feel of their soft, tiny feet as they run up and down his arms. He loves the cute way they snuggle into their shredded paper burrows, and their soft squeaks soothe him as he goes to sleep at night.

The second, less common mice guy enjoys eating mice. The most common way to serve a mouse is battered on a stick, much like a rodentine corn dog. Currently, the International Mouse Gourmands Society is lobbying the producers of Iron Chef to include mice in the possible challenge menus, since there is a little-known and highly complex ancient Okinawan dish that involves whole field mice, sufu, and cubed sea hare. The rest of us can only hope their lobbying efforts fail.

The third and most rare type of mice guys actually turn into mice. Supernature has seen to it that muscothropes make their change when the moon is at its weakest and the night sky nearly black. Since the diet of natural wolves is made largely of field mice in certain areas, it stands to reason that weremice would fall prey to werewolves in great numbers if they had to make their change in the same moonphase.

When in their human form, weremice tend to be small and fine-boned with strong, well-developed teeth. They are universally vegetarians, though few can resist a well-aged cheese. These mice guys make passionate, affectionate lovers, but do tend to be easily startled --

Hang on, somebody's tapping me on the shoulder.

Hi, panamaus, what's up?


Nice guys? I thought we were ... oh.