Homeowner's Associations (HOA
s) are groups that are put together within a subdivision
or housing development ostensibly
to represent the homeowners and make sure that everyone is happy.
In reality, these organizations are much more heinous. Since normal people have better things to do
than rule the minute details
of people's lives, these organizations are populated with incredibly bored
, incredibly anal
people. These are the people who sit in their homes with cameras ready to take a picture of your dog taking a crap in order to nail you on a violation of the covenant
, Clause 143, Paragraph 45, Section 14, Article 5, Chapter 11.
Then, they send out their smarmy newsletter
every month or so with "helpful reminders" about what the covenant
says on various subjects (usually dog poop
). This is accompanied by messages like: "We are making good progress on the problem of dog waste, but there is still a long way to go." These newsletters give away the fact that the HOA is in fact filled with the people who were cheerleaders
or student council
members in high school. These newsletters only serve to remind you that when you bought your house and agreed to the covenant, you unwittingly sold them your soul.
These are the people who have taken a good idea too far. I can understand not wanting people to paint their houses in a rainbow color, or not wanting to have cars jacked up on cinderblocks
in the front yard; but only allowing people 3 different shades of white to use on their home is ridiculous. And so is sending a warning to move a Bronco II (a working, unrusted one) parked in the street because it is an "eyesore." I think that those damned Lexus SUVs
are an eyesore, but I have better things to do than complain every time I see one.
I am convinced that if a fascist
government ever takes hold in the United States
, it will have started in the Homeowner's Associations.