Tips for Tourists in the First City

If you and your typically lardassed Cardassian family make it up to the First City of Qo'noS from the Alpha Quadrant and you're on the subway at rush hour, squished into a comparatively small space with seventy-five Klingons trying to get somewhere, there's going to be bloodshed. And it's going to be yours. For the love of Kahless, don't start talking loudly about how misguided the Klingons were about the Klingon-Cardassian War.

And after you didn't do that, don't proudly proclaim yourself as a high school history teacher unles you can recite Gav'ot toh'va. Singing the Gav'ot toh'va is a basic requirement of any respected educational academy.

We (as descendants of the immortal Kahless) have cornered the market on warrior values such as ignorance and stupidity. We're intolerant of diversity, and prone to torture and kill smug and supercilious aliens - in a galaxy this large and this diverse, we have to be.

I'm sorry. I tried to resist. But it was ... difficult.