I'm warning you God!
Okay God, you listen to me, and you listen good. We both know that you don't like me, and I don't like you, hell, I don't even believe in you. But listen up. We both know that a few weeks ago I went for a job interview, and we made a deal. A deal which mean't I'd start believing in you, and sticking up for you in arguments with my atheist friends if you got me the job. But oh no, I didn't get it did I. You fucked me up good and proper, you sucker punched me, I bet you and your possy of angels had a good old laugh about it didn't you!
But you caught me on a good day God, I'm giving you one last chance. You know the interview I went for on Friday at Holmes Place up by Canary Wharf, you know the place. Well I want that job, and I want it bad. I've been out of work for over a year now God, and I'm getting pretty damn pissed, at just about everything, mainly my stupid mum though. This is your big chance okay, you get me this job and we'll put the past behind us, water under the bridge yeah. I'll never say another bad word against you and will build several churches in your honour if you make that manager guy phone me up, and utter those words which I haven't heard for months on end, "you got the job!". Come on God, you know it makes sense.
If you bend me over and fuck me again though God, our relationship is over......permanently! Just think about it.
21.2.2002 - Man this is some BULLSHIT! Hadn't heard anything back from Holmes Place, so I phone Paul who interviewed me and he doesn't work there anymore! He's left the fucking place in the space of 6 days. Jesus Fucking Christ. Damn you God! They're gonna phone me back. Shambles!............Okay, I have to have another interview on Monday, I can't believe this shit.
1.3.2002 - God made his decision, looks like we, or at least I, am alone in this world. I have exhausted just about every line of enquiry to find employment and am pretty damn desperate about what to do next. I'm fucked.