A few weeks ago, my sister and I visited a little shop called Hot Topic. Essentially, this means mallternative merchandise: band t-shirts, funky bumper stickers, plaid pants and purses with dead cats hanging off the zipper. It now also means Strawberry Shortcake. What? What?! Excuse me, little girl who obviously can't be more than fourteen. What do you know about Strawberry Shortcake? Have you seen the program? Can you do the Purple Pieman dance? Do you even know who the Purple Pieman is?!?
No?! Well before you go wearing her shirt to your next candy raving adventure, let me tell you a thing or two about Strawberry Shortcake.
She was my hero as a child. From 1978 to 1985-ish, Strawberry Shortcake always smelled yummy, had lots of tasty friends, and battled against the bad guys and general not-niceness. Yes, she started out as a doll. But she became so much more: comics, books, television movies, toys, candy, clothing. Why, when I was 5 years old I dropped a penny in a wishing well and made a wish for a pair of Strawberry Shortcake sneakers, complete with little strawberry laces. She was it. As in, where it was at. As in, the coolest friend a girl could have. I stuck by her side, even that time she had a fight with Lemon Meringue and Cafe Au Lait. I was right with her when she won the big-city bake-off. Where were you? Floating around in a womb somewhere, no doubt.
There were only five television "specials" made for Strawberry Shortcake. They came out annually in the early 80's--usually in the springtime. They were frequently rerun on Sunday afternoons, as most people didn't have a VCR at the time. Often these episodes are available at your local video store. Most people loved Strawberry Shortcake for the little dolls, which smell like the desserts they're named after. You can still by t-shirts, candy and lunchboxes, courtesy of "unique" merchandisers that seem to be preying on my youth, attacking my favorite childhood memories, chomping them to bits and then regurgitating them to hungry little chicks everywhere. Where was I? Oh, yes.
The Strawberry Shortcake Universe includes:
Almond Tea Huckleberry Pie
Apple Dumplin' Lemon Meringue
Banana Twirl Mint Tulip
Blueberry Muffin Orange Blossom
Crêpe Suzette Peach Blush
Cafe Au Lait Plum Puddin'
Raspberry Tart
Purple Pieman and Sour Grapes (villains)
Mr. Sun (narrator)