My best insult ever

This was directed at some wanker who advocated mass murder of the poor and believed that he was above everyone else due to his wealth on the ChavScum forums. Sorry if it offends anyone, I was *very* pissed off and have a predisposition for using the word "cunt" to refer to wankers.

Nickzer, you little shit.

You pestulant little turd in the vast unspoilt ocean of humanity. You complete whining loser. You utter bastard, a complete waste of human life, someone so obviously created as the result of an unholy relationship between dog and brick.

I hate you. I hope you fall off a cliff, but just before you hit the bottom (which, I failed to add, is covered in tetanus/AIDS infected spikes) some poor people shoot you repeatedly with harpoons while screaming "Shoot the cunt, he doesn't deserve to live anyway".

You pathetic, evil vermin. You arsehole. You lazy wanker. You utter fool. I can't carry on putting in all these negatives, so here's some positives.

  • You aren't dead, so people can still shoot you.
  • You're also easy to spot so people can shoot you. Anyone can spot you, you're the one running down the street, spots aflame, suit freshly dry cleaned and pressed, Nazi armband glittering in the afternoon sun, screaming "SIEG HEIL" and singing "Deutschland Uber Alles" loudly and off key.
  • You're on this forum, so people can insult you and hopefully track you down by IP address, until ChavScum bans you again.
So you're elitist. w00t for you. I have no idea which elite you belong to which you can look down on us from, as frankly your being a complete wanker whose political views would make Stalin look like a raving leftie liberal precludes your being above anybody aside from rats, and even they're considering a rebellion. In this grand game of chess called life, you aren't even the pawn-you're Colonel Mustard in the conservatory with the candlestick. Why? BECAUSE YOU SHOULDN'T BE IN THIS GRAND GAME OF CHESS CALLED LIFE! YOU SHOULD BE ON SATANS FUCKING CLUEDO BOARD BEING ASSRAPED BY EVERYONE ELSE, BECAUSE YOU CAN'T PAY OFF PEOPLE WANTING TO BUMRAPE YOU WITH DADDY'S MAGIC CREDIT CARD ANY MORE! You SAD, PATHETIC waste of good chemical elements. Nowhere on Earth is desolate or polluted enough for you to blend in naturally. You actually repel pollution with your disgustingness. You're such a pathetic excuse for humanity that even fucking nuclear waste avoids you, let alone girls you sad sack.

I hope ChavScum bans you, and then finds your IP address and sets his server up so when you access this forum you get sent to pictures of dead babies. No, scratch that, Goatse. No, I know what will piss you off: poor people. Yup. You come on ChavScum to troll and instead you get to look at all the people that have to put up with your head-up-arsedness every day of your life, to paint your house, deliver your furniture, make your expensive coffee (you do realise that expensive coffee in "exclusive" coffee shops is a con and you actually get bumraped? Actually, I don't care, I hope Starbucks/Caffe Nero/whatever bankrupt you and your fucking family and make you live on the streets) and generally do all the work that you've never had to do, because you're a rich Conservative (big C) Nazi (big N) wanker with all the gratitude, sharing attitude and kind-heartedness of Kim Jong Il, you stupid cunt. I don't want to know what your parents are like, to raise you like this and turn you into a fucking mentalist.

In conclusion, fuck you, and I hope that whatever children you have (god forbid, they'd probably look like the deformed babies at Greenpeace's website) die in horrible freak car crashes before any of your evil, elitist wanker attitudes rub off on them.


(And I've probably broken all of the terms of service now, oh wait I haven't said anything homophobic or sexist, OK, gays suck, smack my bitch up. Bannable enough yet? BRING IT ON.)