Damn, why do I get stuck with Beverly Hillbillies Fan Club all of the time?

Here's What I've Heard

Everydevel just made up this whole story about Perl, webservers, and databases. Everything 2 is really produced by an infinite number of monkeys who quickly type out the HTML for requested pages. Ever notice the site will go away for a few minutes? That is feeding time.

Nate really doesn't exist. "Nate" is actually an entire race of super-intelligent microbes from Europa. How did they get here? Ever heard of Voyager 2, but I suppose that is another story. (Yes, I know Voyager 2 has been and will always be going away from our fair Earth, but you'll never believe the stories I've heard about those nuclear propulsion systems.)

Everything 3? You guessed it owned, developed, and operated by Metallica's lawyers. (Better get rid of that Napster of Puppets.)