"I'm not a swinger. My idea of a big evening is to go down to the corner rotissimat and watch the chickens revolve."
Yeah, he was joking, but those revolving chickens are a hypnotic force, partly because of the grace with which they move but mostly because they smell so goddamn good. It's times like this that I'm extremely glad I'm not a vegetarian, not because there's anything wrong with it but because I can't imagine living in a world where roasting chicken doesn't make my stomach rumble.
Tex-ess Chicken & Ribs1. is a restaurant in New York City's Gramercy Park neighborhood, located between 21st and 22nd streets on Third Avenue. They serve pretty much what their name suggests, rotisserie chicken and baby back ribs with the occasional beef brisket thrown in, as well as sandwiches, wraps, smoothies and the like.2. They throw together some mean salads too, but most of them are topped with grilled chicken. You can probably get them without, though I honestly think that defeats the purpose.
I tried them for the first time about a week ago and have been going back as much as I can afford to since. Their food is extremely fresh (you see the birds cooking in front of your eyes after all) and the portions are massive. I'm partial to their wraps, probably because calling them wraps is almost as silly as calling a vegetable garden a side salad. These things are huge, easily the size of a nerf football but five pounds heavier, packed with meat and rice (mostly meat, I was delighted to find out) and quite cheap for the amount of food you're getting. You can't eat them without a knife and fork without covering yourself with rice and beans that should be making their way to your mouth.
They deliver ($10 minimum) and accept online orders at their website at http://www.tex-ess.com
1. I have no idea why it's spelled that way and I'm pretty sure they don't really know either.
2. So far as I can tell, the smoothies are completely meat-free.