A song by The Kinks, written by Ray Davies that appears as the opening track on the 1969 album Arthur (or the Decline and Fall of the British Empire). The song is actually a diatribe on Queen Victoria, with the lyrics dripping with sarcasm. Quiet, jangly guitar adds to this song's pop sensibilities, and the song became on of The Kinks most popular tunes, available on almost every compilation and best of.

VICTORIA


Long ago life was clean
Sex was bad and obscene
And the rich were so mean
Stately homes for the Lords
Croquet lawns, village greens
Victoria was my queen
Victoria, Victoria, Victoria, 'toria

I was born, lucky me
In a land that I love
Though I am poor, I am free
When I grow I shall fight
For this land I shall die
Let her sun never set(1)
Victoria, Victoria, Victoria, 'toria
Victoria, Victoria, Victoria, toria

Land of hope and gloria
Land of my Victoria
Land of hope and gloria
Land of my Victoria
Victoria, 'toria
Victoria, Victoria, Victoria, 'toria

Canada to India
Australia to Cornwall
Singapore to Hong Kong
From the West to the East
From the rich to the poor
Victoria loved them all
Victoria, Victoria, Victoria, 'toria
Victoria, Victoria, Victoria

(1): Refers to the phrase; "The sun never sets on the British Empire"


It's a pity I had to do a writeup on the Kinks' song, because if there's one thing that I believe, it's node what you know, and I know fuck all about the Kinks. I do however, consider myself somewhat of a minor authority on The Fall.

Lucky for me, The Fall covered this song. It's track four on their delightfully pop-leaning album of 1988; The Frenz Experiment, and was also available as a 7" or 12" single (The 12" is quite a treat, with three non-album tracks as B sides (Tuff Life Boogie, Guest Informant and Twister) - I actually purchased the twelve inch when I already had the seven inch, but then again I'm a Fall Fan). Released by Beggar's Banquet, The song features Mark E. Smith in a surprisingly jovial mood, and the band play a tight pop-rock version of the song - with the usual Fall twists of course (the breaking glass during the count in gets me everytime). The guitars are big and chunky, fitting in with the solid no-nonsense drumming by Fall 90's staple Simon Wolstencroft. Smith hits some surprising high notes, and manages to sing along reasonably well, with a bit of vocal beat boxing toward the end (Fall style of course). The lyrics are roughly the same as The Kinks' version, except the first line is omitted.

This song, along with it's album counterpart 'Hit the North' were the closest the Fall ever came to chart success (Not counting Lie Dream Of A Casino Soul, which was a minor hit in New Zealand). People come to Fall shows even now and request it, which is of course going against Fall Rules

A note about the videoclip to this song - It's fantastic. In no order, the video features:
  • Mark and the gang wearing Victorian Era clothing
  • Brix Smith being fitted for a dress, and squeezed into a corset
  • A really big, disgusting looking, blue and white cake which explodes for no apparent reason at the end of the clip