It's all very fine and good to enumerate the trappings of a wedding, but this operates on the fallacious assumption that the groom plays a role in any of it, or is even allowed a say.
Here is all a man needs to know about an actual wedding:
- Sit down and shut up.
- If it's your own wedding, stand up and say "I do" at the appropriate time.
- SIT DOWN and SHUT UP.
- If it's your daughter's wedding, sign the checks. Although more modern families leave this responsibility to someone else.
A PATENTED* Gorgonzola throwaway** writeup for temporary humorous effect.
**A few people have begged me not to delete this. It's clearly gone beyond "temporary humorous effect".