I noticed something very interesting recently:

My skill, though somewhat adequate at pool is directly proportionate to the number of attractive women in the room.

Let me tell you how I figured this out. Toastido and I have been going to George's Pool Hall for a few rounds of pool and a few beers. Without mincing words, WE SUCK!! Earlier this week Toastido and I were playing with the aforementioned Morgan and I ended up Ruling the table winning every game of Cut-throat except the last one. It was a Friday, so there were quite a few attractive ladies in the bar.

This begins my theory. That same night I ended up with the nickname {scratch-o-matic], due ot my ability to utterly F$CK UP and sink the cue ball. But otherwise, it had a good night. The next night, Toastido and I played again and we were pretty even, although I did tend to Tank every game, I'm still not sure why. That night there were a few cute girls in the bar, but nothing to get my boxers in a twist about. Sunday was empty, there were white-hats with their girlfriends on the other side of the bar, but nothing to twitch over. My playing was so awful I couldn't even believe it myself.

I would pop the Cue Ball off the table almost every game, it was AWFUL. After every missed shot or tanked game, I exclaimed a jubilant cry of, "Good thing I'm not trying to get laid tonite!" Near the end of our time, the hot female bartender came to our corner of the bar, which was otu of sight of the security cameras to have a drink. Toastido completely bungled from the most enjoyable distraction, and I postulated the theorm that our abilities were relative to the number of attractive women. Just as we were about to leave, some attractive women came in an set up next to us, toastido's skill level lowered and Mine rose. We determined that our skill levels were definately somehow related to how many attractive women were standing around us.