Monday..we got back from CT last night around 11pm, spent four more hours on the net. Today, went to Port Jefferson, a little seaside town here in Long Island. Found a coffee bar called Tiger Lily, reminded me of Insomnia, back in Florida. Alot. Hung out for a bit, then continued exploring.
I feel so lost here in a way in Long Island. I mean, I'm back HOME, in New England. Yet I feel like a foriegner. When I arrived in Palm Harbor, Florida, two years ago, I knew I was an outsider, and acted thus. The defensiveness I held blunted the reactions I recieved as a crazy northern transplant. Now that I'm "home" I have no such armor. And I don't want it.
I guess the problem is that when was down there, almost right off the bat, I found myself in a "circle". I do like being alone, strive for it, but now that I have it (have nothing), I'm left wanting for more.
"So go out and make friends"
Sure. I don't want new friends. Just more to lose. But that's not how life works, and we all know that.
Doesn't make it any easier.