user since
Fri Mar 8 2002 at 17:05:10 (22.8 years ago )
last seen
Sun Aug 28 2005 at 20:39:23 (19.3 years ago )
level / experience
0 (Initiate) / 0
mission drive within everything
I look forward to the challenges that are ahead and the opportunity to work with the many great people that make up this community
specialties
Athletics, motivational speaking, Social Studies, beer
school/company
CVHS
motto
never sacrifice fun for winning, however, a byproduct of winning is fun.
Send private message to CoachW.

Name: Coach Bill Werkheiser
Occupation: High School Teacher/Varsity Football Coach (10 year record 78-25)
Location: Southern California
Bio:
Born and raised on a cattle ranch in Montana.
Enlisted in the United States Army 1965, stationed in Germany.
Honorable discharge 1971 at the rank of Staff Sargent.
Bachelors in Social Sciences from Boise State University 1975.
Met my wife Jenny at BSU and married her July 4, 1976.
Three sons and two daughters: Vince, Landry, Thorpe, Deacon and Madden

Every year I get an empty Yuban coffee can, cut a hole in the lid, decorate it with the school colors (blue and gold) and hang it by the door of my office. I let the kids know they can drop any question they want in the 'ol can and I'll answer it in each of my five classes after roll call.

In keeping with the spirit of the coffee can, you can all feel free to ask questions through the messages in the chatterbox. I'll answer them here.


coach w, when I'm in the shower, sometimes I think about the bag girl at the pioneermart and want to, well, touch myself real bad. Am I OK?

The first couple of questions every year are about masturbation. I find the best thing to do is answer the question as serious as my wedding vows - then look for the kid that blushes. Even the cocky know-it-alls blush believe me in 25 odd years of teaching it's never failed.

Yes, son. You are OK. Stay away from the Pioneer and get into a good training program. Weights and running. Start off with three reps of ten and build from there. Shower quickly (no nonsense) and take one bath a week Saturday night before church. Remember, Winners go through a problem, Losers go around it, but never get past it


Here's a question: When I run the laps in gym class, my teeth and chin start to itch. What could be causing this?

You probably have some nerves that are miswired in your body. Try using a rubber mouth guard (available at most sporting goods stores). Get plenty of sleep and start a regimen of good bran cereal every morning. Itching is no reason to stop running laps. Remember, Winners always have a plan, Losers always have an excuse.


Have you done your P.E. today?
I am laughing from your home node!

Like at least 20 jumping jacks. and i walked for two plus hours. whee.

yessir, coach. i just got done lifting weights and i rode my bicycle 3 miles home in the rain. now i'm having a protien shake and i'm gonna beat up some nerdy kid later on.
yessir, coach. i'm gonna have a big bowl of Colon Blow right after this

oh shit! it's coach!

No sir, i left my gym bag at home, today.

Sure, "Bill," "I" have "done" my "P.E." "today."

i wanted to, but it's snowing. can i just do an extra couple laps tomorrow?

i have a doctor's excuse. I got the asthma.

SIR NO SIR PRIVATE _________ DOES PT SIR SINCE THE PRIVATE JOINED THE ARMY SIR