Cats are nice, aren't they? I like my cat. And when I've had stressful day at the office, I like to come home and stroke my cat. He purrs on my knee, and he calms me down. Nice kitty.

But, urrrgh! What's this? Sometimes, my cat misses the litter tray. Sometimes, yes, usually when I have neglected to clean it quite as often as His Feline Highness would like, he just goes wherever and whenever he feels like it.

Bad kitty!

Now, we all know that cats dislike water. And holes. So it'll come as a bit of a surprise that you can actually teach your cat to use a real, proper toilet. And it's actually quite easy, as long as you start 'em young. Here's how:

  • Okay, you will need a large, see-through bowl or pan that you can fit inside the bowl of your toilet, but not cover the seat. This is going to be your training litter tray - a potty for cats, if you will.
     
  • Before your adorable cute little kitten gets into a routine of using a litter tray (or crapping on the kitchen floor), get him to use the bowl, filled with ordinary cat litter. Obviously this is easier if you have no other toilet-based routines to replace. Not so young that you're poor kitty is still unstable on his feet, but as soon as you feel confident that he wont wobble off balance and drown.
     
  • After the lovely animal has got the hang of that, remove some kitty litter each time you clean out the bowl, eventually leaving the cat with no litter. He might not like this for a day or two, but he'll soon learn.
     
  • One day, just remove the bowl completely. He'll just use the toilet. It is important to not do this until the cat is fairly well grown and steady on his feet! We don't want to drown the poor guy!
     
  • Voila! He will still refuse use the flush though. I'm working on that.
     

Good kitty!

Remarkable as it may seem, it is actually fairly easy to do, and it'll save you a fortune on kitty litter. Not to mention the great pleasure you can get out of amusing house guests with your feline-chums unwitting party piece.