Despite the rather hysterical name, 'Screen It!' (at http://www.screenit.com/) is nonetheless the best of the parental content reviewing websites out there; rather like Snopes.com, it is both venerable and reasonable. It has been on the internet since 1996 (the design remains unchanged) and is run by retired government worker Jim Judy and his wife, armed with tape recorders and notepads.

The site serves a similar purpose to the ChildCare Action Project but takes a very different approach. For a start, Screen It! does not have an overzealous Old Testament-style religious agenda. Secondly, the approach is much more scholarly - the instances of swearing, nudity and so forth are catalogued and described but not commented upon otherwise. Thirdly, the site keeps its critical opinion of the film separate from the monitoring aspect, and their reviews are well-written and reasonable. And most importantly, it seems to have been produced by sane people. Because of this it is both less famous and less funny than the CAP, but more useful if you are a concerned parent or a voyeur wondering which film to rent from the video shop (the descriptions of nudity and sex do not have as much satanic embellishment). Cleverly, the descriptions of violence and suspense avoid giving away spoilers.

Of the categories of potentially offensive material, the oddest are by far 'Music (Inappropriate)' (for those irritating musical stings in slasher movies) and 'Disrespectful / Bad Attitude'. Of the latter we learn that, in 'Star Wars', "Obviously Vader and the rest of the Empire have both".

We also learn that 'South Park: Bigger, Longer, and Uncut' contains "At least 133 "f" words (with at least 3 used sexually), 36 "s" words, 9 slang terms for male genitals ("d*ck," "c*ck" and "pr*ck"), 3 slang terms for female genitals ("p*ssy" and "poontang"), 17 asses (one used with "hole"), 5 damns, 3 S.O.B.s, 2 hells, 1 crap and 4 uses each of "G-damn" and "Oh my God" and 1 use each of "Dear God" and "For God's sakes" as exclamations". As far as I can determine the least offensive film of the last seven years is 'Barney's Great Adventure', although it's worth noting that the film nonetheless contains 'Frightening Scenes', 'Imitative Behaviour' and 'Music (Scary / Tense)'. And for that matter 'Alcohol or drug use'.

The site reviews videos, albums and first-run cinema films, although its main focus is the latter. Its coverage is extensive and presumably Jim Judy's collection of cinema tickets is awesome. His local cinema must love him to bits, and I assume he lives on popcorn and soft drinks, so he must work out constantly.